Wednesday, 24 June 2015

Farmers Market DSP ... and the perils of nature

Look at that lovely paper. Look at it! It has vegetables on it and takes me right back to my early days of stamping when one of my favourite stamps was a pea pod. So what if everyone thought I was weird; I loved it. This paper is from the Farmers Market Designer Series Paper pack and, as soon as I saw it, I knew I’d have to have it. 

I chose this particular sheet for this project partly because it’s my favourite from the whole pack and partly because I thought it would make fantastic dress fabric for a vintage frock. The recipient, you see, was my vintage frock-loving friend at work who very kindly and nobly stepped in to walk the Pink Ribbonwalk with me the other weekend, when all three of my team unfortunately had to pull out at the last minute, for various reasons. 

I was extremely grateful to Jane for ensuring I didn’t have to walk 10 miles on my own, so made her this card. It’s a simple idea but does require measuring and - le gasp! - the Stamp-a-ma-Jig. Eeek. 

Talking of walks, yesterday evening I went for a walk with another friend, who just happens also to be one of my downlines.  We’ve both pledged to do more walking, in a vague attempt to get more active, so off we trotted. We were both in quite grumpy moods, for reasons too dull to mention, and thought the walk would cheer us up… if we could just stop moaning for a few minutes. 

I strode confidently across the fields, taking a route I’ve followed many times before. One of the highlights of this particular route is that there are donkeys and you probably know how I feel about donkeys (clue: they’re great!). One of the disadvantages is that the donkeys are only there occasionally, but that does add a frisson of “will they, won’t they?” to proceedings (I lead a very dull life, clearly).

First hurdle… a loose Jack Russell. Now as you have probably guessed, I do love all (furry) animals but I have to confess that I am a little wary of Jack Russell terriers. I have only ever been bitten by two dogs in my life; one was a Jack Russell and one was a border collie. So guess what was following the Jack Russell? Yep, a border collie.

However, I knew this one was friendly… a little too friendly actually; as a couple of summers ago this same dog had a fine ole time trying to hump my daughter’s leg. 

Keen to avoid being snarled at, bitten or … honestly I can’t think of a word that’s clean enough to describe what the border collie probably had in mind, so let’s move on… I hotfooted it into the next field. And hotfooted it out again, to put my fleece back on to protect myself from the shoulder-high nettles. 

The dogs had lost interest (should we be offended?) so we made our way gingerly through the nettles and into the field. Which just happened to be packed with knee-high thistles. That was no fun either, so we had to take another route. Frustratingly, the donkeys were there but we couldn’t get to them.

We grumbled along for another mile or so, finally finding somewhere pretty and navigable. But lo! What was that at the top of the hill? A herd of cows. Well, bullocks (and other expletives). And, yes, an actual bull. With a ring through his nose and everything. 

But I love all (furry) animals, remember, and felt reasonably confident that they would disperse. After all, they hadn’t chased the dog we’d just passed. Still, I began to feel less confident as we approached the herd. And then Mr Bull stood up and planted himself squarely in front of the stile. 

That was that. We scurried into the adjacent field … and promptly got stuck on the barbed wire. Both of us. The back of my T-shirt was suspended from barbed wire and I looked down to see that the front of my T-shirt was stuck, too. I turned my head to the left and found myself face to face with an assembly of inquisitive cows. And bullocks. And yes, Mr Bull was there at the front of the mob. 

This was the view from my barbed wire prison

But we laughed in the face of danger. There really was nothing left to be done. And eventually Alison managed to free herself, and then me… and we were on our merry way. Just one more delicate clamber through the barbed wire and we were back on the route. This was when Alison put her hand straight on a thistle. 

Blood pressure soaring, we headed for home. Who says exercise is good for you? 


  1. i have laughed so much at this account of your attempt at an enjoyable walk don't think i can recant a more exciting event !! patsy

  2. My goodness that was a story and a half!! Loved every heart-stopping moment of it! haha. Brilliant. And I agree, the dsp would make lovely vintage fabric too.


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